South West dad makes birthday card appeal for 23-year-old autistic son

Ryan Murphy had only ever received birthday cards from his parents and pets until he was 21-years-old

Author: Isabel KimbreyPublished 17th Nov 2020
Last updated 17th Nov 2020

The dad of a 23-year-old autistic man from Cheltenham has made an appeal on Twitter for people to send him birthday cards.

Ryan's dad, who wanted to remain anonymous, says until his 21st birthday Ryan would only ever receive cards from his parents - or his cat and his dog.

Ryan has autism and learning difficulties and has a love for opening letters and other types of mail that comes through the letter box.

For the third year in a row, he's now appealing for people to send him a birthday card for when he turns 24-years-old on December 9.

Ryan's dad said: "For his 21st birthday, we didn't get the influx of cards that you might expect for the milestone birthday so I joined up to Twitter to make the appeal.

Ryan has never been invited to a birthday party either, with his dad explaining that this is quite common as autistic people don't get included as much as everybody else.

He said: "I felt bad making the first appeal because I thought I had failed him because he never received birthday cards. So I knew that I needed to make this appeal and take responsibility as a parent."

After Ryan's dad made the first appeal 2 years ago, Ryan received between 100 and 200 hundred birthday cards.

The second year an appeal was made, around 400 cards were received from all over the world.

Ryan's dad was sceptical to make the appeal this year due to the impact the coronavirus pandemic has had on so many peoples lives.

As a result of the Covid-19 crisis, the family has received very little post which has disappointed Ryan who loves to open it.

"The other day we received a letter from the cinema which was our first bit of post for a while", Ryan's dad said.

"When I saw how excited he got, jumping up and down, smiling; I could see how happy he was and realised I had to make an appeal this year despite the pandemic."

Ryan's life is based around routine which enables him to live with little disruption and anxiety.

However, due to the lockdown, Ryan's routine has been disrupted and has at times found it difficult to cope.

"Along came coronavirus which disrupted everything, so instead he'll now get up at 3 o clock in the morning instead of 5 o clock.

"As his parent and carer, I've had to try to keep his routine as close as possible to normal, in an impossible situation", Ryan's dad explained.

Lockdown life has proved to be very difficult for Ryan and his parents, with his dad saying they've had little support other than what's on social media.

He said: "Ryan does go to a day centre so we are very, very lucky for him to be able to access that, although it has been a lot less during the pandemic.

"During the first lockdown we weren't able to get food deliveries but trying to take my son to a supermarket is absolutely impossible due to his autism.

"As carers, we are lonely. We don't really mix with people and it's been like that for so many years.

"So being able to make this appeal is great and I'm so glad I did it because I know when my son's birthday comes around, he's going to get all these letters and it's going to be amazing seeing him open them all."

If you would like to send Ryan a birthday card, please send them to:

Ryan Murphy, Post Restante, Bath Road Post Office, 170 Bath Road, Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, GL53 7NF