Lil Nas X opens up about awkward dating moments AND reveals his teenage celebrity crush

He spoke with Harriet Rose for our 'My Teenage Self: Pride Edition' series

Author: Sona OsosamiPublished 18th Jun 2021

Since publicly coming out in June 2019 at the end of Pride Month, Lil Nas X has established himself as a queer icon. After taking the world by storm in 2019 with his now Diamond-certified, double GRAMMY winning hit, ‘Old Town Road’ Lil Nas, real name Montero Lamar Hill, has pushed boundaries, not only in music but also fashion and internet culture.

Speaking to KISS’ very own Harriet Rose for our ‘My Teenage Self: Pride Edition’ feature, Lil Nas spoke about the freedom that comes with acknowledging himself as gay and how it affects his relationships with others.

“I do feel a lot freer now, but it’s hard when you like people and you never know whether they are authentic or not.”

In 2019, the singer came out to his close family, but states that he began to accept his sexuality as more than a phase around the age of 17. His intention of keeping that side of his identity hidden, alongside the traditional household he was raised in, meant that Lil Nas’ experience with dating as a young adult was limited.

“I never got the opportunity to date as a teenager. But my first celebrity crush was probably Usher. It was more than a crush, his album was one of the first I ever bought.

"I just thought, oh my God, he’s the biggest star ever. I’ve met him a couple of times now. It’s insane, you know?”

Whilst Lil Nas felt the perception of his sexuality would affect how he was treated by the people around him, the entertainer looks back fondly on the moments during his teenage years that enabled him to take control of his life.

“My favourite memory as a teenager is maybe when I turned 18. I dyed my hair dark brown and it felt like a moment of freedom for me. My dad wasn’t happy about it, but I was like ‘Yeah! I did it! I dyed my hair! So that was fun.”

The ‘Sun Goes Down’ singer was the first artist to come out publicly whilst holding a Number 1 song on the Billboard charts. This boldness in his identity has become synonymous with the Georgia-born entertainer, the internet-breaking music video for ‘Montero (Call Me by Your Name) perhaps being the best example of his growing confidence.

And with his increased confidence, Lil Nas is now making up for lost time by trialing the dating apps.

“I did get on this one app last year and actually ended up meeting some of my current celebrity crushes for the first time. It was weird.”

Lil Nas’ path to self-acceptance was not easy. Reflecting on his teenage inner thoughts in an Instagram post titled ‘dear 14 year old montero’, the ‘c7osure’ singer opens up about how he once promised himself to ‘never come out publicly’ and to ‘die with the secret.’ His internal conflict plays out in the video of his latest single ‘Sun Goes Down,’ where a teenage X locks himself in the bathroom at prom in tears.

In coming to terms with who he is, Lil Nas now lives with the same carefree attitude we see at the end of the 'Sun Goes Down' video.

Inspired to live freely by the likes of Frank Ocean and his self-described queer icon Sam Smith, he can now belt out his favourite karaoke song ‘Perfect Illusion’ by Lady Gaga without fear. Perhaps we can even look forward to a Sam Smith collab in the near future…

Rounding off their conversation Harriet asked Lil Nas for one piece of advice he’d give to his teenage self.

“No matter how scary it may look, you’re definitely gonna make it through.”

Watch the full clip on our Instagram here, as well as the latest episode featuring Years and Years frontman, Olly Alexander.

Where can I hear more from Harriet Rose?

You can catch Harriet alongside Jordan Banjo and Perri Kiely every weekday on KISS Breakfast from 6am-10am bringing her OWN take on what's going on in the world right now.

You can also follow Harriet Rose on Instagram here.

Read more:

Lil Nas X's 'Old Town Road' becomes most certified song in history

Lil Nas X pens emotional letter to 14-year-old self to mark 'Montero' video

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