How to tell your children that you're ready to start dating again

If you're a single parent and you're ready to get back into the dating scene then these top tips are a good place to start preparing.

Published 27th Apr 2016
Last updated 27th Jan 2017

If you're a single parent and feel like you need to postpone dating until your child/children are adults that's absolutely fine. Equally though, if you're ready to get back into the dating scene then these top tips for single parents are a good place to start preparing:

Talk first, date second It's natural for children to be a bit cautious around the idea of a parent dating, we recommend that you sit down with them and have a heart to heart to let them know why you plan to start dating again.

Remember this isn't a conversation asking for their permission it's an opportunity to explain to them why you want to meet someone so they feel a part of the whole process.

Encourage them to express their emotions After giving them time to get to grips with the idea, if they are still resistant you should keep encouraging them to express their feelings more.

Many children, especially those who are a little older will understand your reasons and just want you to be happy. If they aren't quite ready, try not to shout, or get angry with them for feeling upset about the idea. Bear in mind that it's a massive change for them to handle.

Ask them what it is that upsets them the most about the idea? Is it because, they think you won't give them attention? Do they still hope you'll get back with their mummy/daddy? Will the children at school tease?

Avoid making any promises you can't keep i.e. you won't re-marry or have more children.

Let them know you still want to date and youunderstand it's hard for them to get used to the idea. Keep talking as much as they want to.

Quality time Make extra effort to spend quality time with them doing fun things that they enjoy. Remind them that dating doesn't mean that you won't spend time with them just like this...

Be subtle You may need to have this conversation with your child numerous times, stay patient and be sensitive to their feelings. In time, they'll come round.

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