LISTEN: Ayrshire mum who suffered seven miscarriages reveals devastating impact

Ruth is speaking to mark the start of Baby Loss Awareness Week

Published 9th Oct 2018
Last updated 9th Oct 2018

Hundreds of women are sharing their experiences of losing a baby to mark the start of baby loss awareness week.

It runs from Tuesday 9th October until Monday 15th October and encourages bereaved parents to speak out and support each other.

The week also aims to raise awareness about issues surrounding pregnancy and of the support available to women, friends and family.

Ruth from Ayrshire knows all too well the heartache it can cause after going through seven miscarriages in the space of around two years.

She says, "It was challenging trying to say to people who you hadn't seen for a while that things haven't gone as you planned.

"Throughout the years of the losses, we went through many different tests. Doctors just couldn't find anything to say what was causing the miscarriages.

"If you think of every negative thing you could say about yourself, that's how I felt. Worthless, incomplete and alone.

"Even though there were other people who had experienced miscarriages - I was in a forum so spoke to many - you still felt like you were the only person going through this.

"It's very difficult but our situations are there to teach us something. If I hadn't gone through what I did, I wouldn't be hear speaking out about it and trying to help others now.

"I was meant to be a parent and I wish it happened the more conventional way. But it didn't. And that's something I have to let go of and move on."

Charities across the country are supporting the awareness week. One of them is the Misscarriage Association.

Ruth Bender Atik from the organisation says, "Miscarriages are all very different experiences. But what is shared are the feelings that come with it. Loss, sadness, grief.

"As each pregnancy ends, you begin to think that this is never ever going to happen for you. You might feel worse and worse after each loss.

"All the distress that can cause you can be exhausting and also very frightening. The emotional impact is extremely strong.

"Also, people don't always tell family and friends they are pregnant so sometimes they don't get any support from those around them. But it's simply because they didn't know about the pregnancy in the first place.

"There is a tendancy for us to try and cheer people up but actually, what helps the most, is to say that actually you're just really sorry."